I thought I had a doctor that was going to help me. At least he seemed to be trying...
Then, he had a stroke.
I called to get my prescription filled agian. That's how I found out.
A different doctor was suggested. He wanted to monitor me again while I was on the medication. Why can't he just look at my doctor's notes? He said it was because he hadn't seen me before. Okay... I called my insurance to make sure this procedure would be covered again so soon. Yes. Good. So, I'll just start up with this new doctor. But... they want me to pay 1/2 the infertility fee up front to continue the procedure. No, I would not pay the fee, this was not about being treated for infertility!!! Fortunately, this doctor agrees to go ahead as before and orders the first of two meds for me. I pick it up. I take those as directed. 10 days later I call in to get the second half of the prescription and to set up the appointment with the doctor. Then his nurse, who I'm on the phone with, tells me that after the appointment I will need to stop at the front desk and pay half the infertility fee. I remind her that we are not treating infertility and that the whole reason I had started visiting them was to see if I could take metformin. (This doctor is not even the fertility specialist --- the specialist is the one who had the stroke!) I politely (just-in-case I have to call back) said I would call back later to make the appointment --- I was FURIOUS! What a stupid trick! Do I appear so STUPID that it seems professional to dangle a prescription in front of me like bait so they can have my money. So, what did I do? I cried. I cried in self pity and defeat. And, later that day, when I wasn't feeling so bad, I called my husband and gave him the story, I said, "I am so sad" which made me cry again.
He wanted to make it all better. He told me to find a doctor in SLC and make an appointment and we would go there on Saturday. I agreed and cried some more.
So, I searched the internet. There's one place in SLC and one in Pleasant Grove that specializes in infertility. I left a message with the one in PG simply because it felt more close to home. And I continued to search forums of people who had advice on which doctors to see out there.
However, I kept wanting a more holistic approach. Something more than just drugs to make things happen. I totally believe in a healthy diet, but I've been trying for YEARS to eat healthier. And, although I have made some good changes in my families diet --- it is NOT ENOUGH! And, it gets so frustrating that sometimes I completely give up. I wish I didn't. I wish I were stronger, more devoted, had more support and on and on...
I got sidetracked and started looking into finding a nutritionist. If doctors want "$20,000" for IVF then shouldn't I be doing more for my body to prepare for a pregnancy? $20,000! And again, having a baby seemed unatainable. And the fact that there have been a lot of miscarriages on my side of the family always haunts me. If I do get pregnant, $20,000 later, that doesn't mean I'll keep it. Would it be a $20,000 heartbreak?
My sister hooked me up with her nutritionist.
I am so excited!!! (Just don't expect that same enthusiasm from my family.)
The nutritionist sent me a list of herbs and a 3-day detox to get started.
My sister picked up a bunch of "Dr. Christopher's" herbs for me yesterday.
I've been wondering how I am going to eat better... how I'm going to get more greens into my body and feel satisfied. How extreme do I need to get until it becomes enough?
As I thought about nourishing my body this morning, I googled "Mormons and raw" which lead me to And the Lion Shall Lie Down with the Lamb: An LDS Member's View of Vegetarianism by Kevin D. Pomeroy and have since been pondering quite in depth about two specific ideas Pomeroy included in two of several essays:
The prophet Isaiah paints us a wonderful picture concerning the return of the Savior and his millennial reign. It will be a glorious time to live on the earth. The Lord says: “For, behold, I create new heavens and a new earth: and the former shall not be remembered.” (Isaiah 65:17) The tenth Article of Faith teaches us that “...the earth will be renewed and receive its paradisiacal glory.” It will be like the Garden of Eden. In Eden Adam and Eve only partook of the fruit of the trees and the herbs of the field.
During the millennium we will be able to truly reap what we sow. Isaiah prophesies that “they shall not build, and another inhabit; they shall not plant, and another eat: for as the days of a tree are the days of my people, and my elect shall long enjoy the work of their hands.” (Isaiah 65:22.) The Doctrine & Covenants support this by saying: “In that day an infant shall not die until he is old; and his life shall be as the age of a tree;” (D&C 101:30). Brigham Young comments on that day by saying: “When men live to the age of a tree, their food will be fruit.”
Even nature and the animals will be affected by this change. Isaiah presents this vision: “The wolf also shall dwell with the lamb, and the leopard shall lie down with the kid; and the calf and the young lion and the fatling together; and a little child shall lead them. And the cow and the bear shall feed; their young ones shall lie down together: and the lion shall eat straw like the ox. And the sucking child shall play on the hole of the asp, and the weaned child shall put his hand on the cockatrice’ den.
They shall not hurt nor destroy in all my holy mountain… (Isaiah 11:6-9). This is a pretty straightforward revelation. In God’s ideal world, a world that we currently don’t exist in, the Lord intends that the lion eat straw like an ox. He also wishes that creatures are not to be destroyed. In fact Isaiah goes as far to suggest the reason why this destruction ceases is not because of a physical change, but because of knowledge, a correct knowledge of the ways of the Lord. Isaiah reaffirms the same thoughts toward the end of his ministry as contained in : “The wolf and the lamb shall feed together, and the lion shall eat straw like the bullock: and dust shall be the serpent’s meat. They shall not hurt nor destroy in all my holy mountain, saith the Lord.” (Isaiah chapter 65:25) … So understanding the state that we will be living during the millennium is of critical importance to the Lord.
Hyrum Smith, brother to the Prophet Joseph Smith and Assistant President of the Church taught, “God...knows what course to pursue to restore mankind to...pristine excellency and primitive vigour, and health; and He has appointed the Word of Wisdom as one of the engines to bring about this thing, to remove the beastly appetites, the murderous disposition and the vitiated taste of man, to restore his body and vigour, promote peace between him and the brute creation, and as one of the little wheels in God’s design, to help to regulate the great machinery, which shall eventually revolutionize the earth, and bring about the restoration of all things.” (Times and Seasons 3:799-801)
Let the people be holy, and the earth under their feet will be holy. Let the people be holy, and filled with the Spirit of God, and every animal and creeping thing will be filled with peace; the soil of the earth will bring forth in its strength, and the fruits thereof will be meat for man. The more purity that exists, the less is the strife; the more kind we are to our animals, the more will peace increase, and the savage nature of the brute creation vanish away… Let the whole people… be possessed of that spirit and here is the Millennium, and so will it spread over all the world. (Teachings of Presidents of the Church, Brigham Young, p. 333)
Wow! So, this says that if all humans cared for animals as Adam did (because we are filled with the Spirit of God), it would take away the animals' "savage nature," even a bear's! We can take away animals' fierceness simply by being kind to them. (Isn't that so strange though --- because we're taught that human kindness will kill a wild animal! We hear of the one person being nice to one animal, that's all it takes is one person, to get an animal to trust humans, and then bang! the hunter's got 'em.) But take out the hunters, the abuse, add in God's kindness, and, we, humans and animals, could live together in peace, just as Isaiah prophesied would happen in the millenium. And this will happen because, we, as a people, will make it happen. And, so here I sit, pondering on this now instead of nutritional greens... Yet, I feel enlightened --- and am again considering vegetarianism. I'm not promising anything… it turns out I'm addicted to meat... although, it certainly doesn't seem bad and definitely seems the way of the future!
As a side note, my Blentec just arrived! So, I'm off to find something green to blend!!!